Technique for Listening

I have conducted few seminars on communication skills. I often share my email id for after thoughts, comments etc.

I got a mail from one of the participant which went some thing like this

"Hi Nilesh,

Thanks for a wonderful course. I never knew that learning could be such fun and your enthusiasm and energy has really left an impression on the group.

I really enjoyed those active listening exercises that we completed on the course as this is an area I feel really difficult to master. I know it's only been few days since the course but I feel I am getting better at it as I am implementing the technique that you covered.

Have you got a short, sharp model that I can easily remember that I can take into EVERY situation when I need to actively listen?

Thanks again Nilesh

What you do is just great

Manjeet"

My response was something like this

"Hi Manjeet,

Thanks for kind comments!

You did a great job on the second exercise when you went into it with the mindset of "Active" listening rather then "Passive" listening.

Ok, let me give you a simple technique that you can use to become a better listener. It's called  R.A.S.E

R = Respond to the content

A = Acknowledge the feelings of what is being said

S = Show your understanding

E = Encourage further information

Let me give you an example:

RESPOND TO THE CONTENT

This is another term for reflecting back what they have said in your own terms. By doing this it demonstrates your own understanding and if you know you have to do this it really makes you listen believe me!

This is also called "paraphrasing". There is a section on there in your workbook. So, if the person says:

"You can really see the bad atmosphere within that group"

You could reply with:

"So, there are some serious going's on then with people"

This response shows the speaker that you have understood what they have said.

Then.....

ACKNOWLEDGE THE FEELINGS

So you change your focus to acknowledge what the person must be feeling:

"It sounds as though you are feeling uncomfortable about what is currently going on within your group"

Then...

SHOW THAT YOU UNDERSTAND

Make your understanding real and legitimate even if you do not agree with them yourself. Remember, you are taking the speakers point of view into account and appreciate that.

"If I was in your situation I would feel uncomfortable too. I can see that you do not like this type of atmosphere in the air at work"

Then...

ENCOURAGE FURTHER INFORMATION

The final step in RASE is to encourage further discussion by asking an open ended question.

"So, tell me - what exactly is going on there?"

In Summary:

I hope that you find that model useful.

That does not mean that you use it every time as people will tend to see straight through it if you do.

Add it to your toolbox of skills and use it whenever you need it.

Thanks again and please do take advantage of our post-course email support system, it is there to help you.

- Nilesh"

Hope you find this useful. If you have any useful techniques please share.